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Richard
Richard is the gentle one amongst us. His calm demeanour can sometime completely disguise the amount of pressure he is put under by the design and sales team always wanting the most complex of issues sorted within minutes.In his spare time, he does what he does all day; he's a proper geek alright.
Maurice was staggering along a road in the ritziest part of town, throwing empty beer cans into the street and falling into people's gardens. His singing gained the attention of a passing policeman. "What do you think you're doing in this area drunk out of your mind and making so much noise?" the policeman asked. "Forgive me, officer," said Maurice, "but today is my office's annual outing and I couldn't very well not have a few beers, could I?" "Well, I understand," said the policeman, "but where are all the others?" "I wouldn't know," said Maurice. "I'm self-employed!"
I'm currently reading No Country for Old Men, by Cormac McCarthy. It's a gripping read so far but McCarthy has an annoying habit of using the word "and" far too often in his novels. For example:
"Richard started reading. He switched on the lamp and put his specs on and turned the TV off and put the phone off the hook. This made it easier for him to concentrate."
Now that I've noticed this trend, I'll be bugged by it constantly.
Sunday: Shugborough Hall. Better than I expected; a really good day out in fact. Only downside is that we forgot our National Trust membership cards so had to pay full price. Ho-hum.
Have a grand bank holiday, folks!
Joke
A little boy got lost at a football match. He found a security guard and said, "I don't know where my dad is.
"What's he like?" asked the policeman.
"Beer and women", said the little boy.
GIF
Rant
I just got undertaken by a Mercedes Benz while doing over 70mph on a motorway slip road. Later, in the city centre I got blocked off at two sets of traffic lights by Audi drivers who were in the wrong lane. If I get tail-gated by a BMW on the way home, I score a hat-trick.
The holiday in Wales was fabulous. The cottage was great, the surroundings were awesome and the company was second to none. Jo had her practical driving test on Wednesday, so we had to drive all the way back to Lichfield for the day but it was worth it - she passed! Driving into work this morning felt distinctly vanilla when compared to the twisty Welsh roads. In total we covered 900.5 miles, (I know; sounds like a fix), over the course of the week!
We took a trip to Aberystwyth on Sunday and were treated to gloriously sunny weather... I even topped up my tan! The rest of the week was pretty off-and-on, weather-wise but it really didn't matter all that much. Methinks we'll be going back in the not too distant future.
Melissa: Miguel is the man I'm going to marry.
Morticia: Oh, he's so handsome that it's no wonder you picked him over Carlos and Pedro.
Melissa: He is handsome, but you should have seen the Juan that got away.
Holiday tomorrow - hooray! I just hope that my windscreen gets sorted today. Hopefully Friday the 13th won't bite me in the bum.
The Bad: I have a chip in my windscreen which needs fixing before we go away. Due to the size and location, it means that the whole windscreen needs replacing, apparently. Thank God for fully comprehensive insurance.
The Ugly: The weather. Hope it picks up while we're away!
I spent the day at Edgbaston Cricket grounds yesterday, watching the cricket with Ian. It was awesome fun although I might have over-done the Guinness!
Mabel: Why's that?
Doris: The local peeping tom bought me curtains.
In other news, I'm going on holiday in Wales soon which I'm really looking forward to. We're staying in a cottage close to the Brecon Beacons where you get very little mobile / 3G service. Being switched off from T'internet for a whole week is something I think I need.
Film recommendation: The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo. All the critics are raving about it, with good reason.
Book recommendation: The Road by Cormac McCarthy. Read 30-odd pages last night before bed and I'm already hooked.
That is all.
Joke of the day:
After suffering through years of his wife's terrible coffee, Simon spit out his morning cup and took the coffeemaker to his lawyer's office. He dropped the coffeemaker on the lawyer's desk.
Simon said, "Well, here they are."
The lawyer responded, "What?"
"Grounds for divorce."
</groan>
The pick of the bunch is a HDR shot of the NCP car park down the road from Cherry HQ. I've walked past this shot hundreds of times and thought "next time I have my camera":
First off, parents taking their kids to school by car when most of them live under a mile away is uber annoying. Lazy swines. They should be forced to walk or face huge taxes. (Unless they're disabled). The kids would be healthier and it would drastically reduce congestion.
Secondly, HGV drivers trying to overtake other HGVs at a snail's pace. Duuuude, you're going a whole half a mile per hour faster than the lorry you're behind. Live with it and stop ruining my commute! If it takes you 5 minutes to pass a vehicle, it's probably not worth overtaking! OK, on the motor way this isn't that big of a deal unless the fast lane is congested but on dual-carriage way, this situation makes me wish I had James Bond style machine guns attached to my car.
Shaun: Additionally, The Times' website now breaks DDA compliancy laws. You can't login to the service without a Javascript enabled browser.
Looking forward to this weekend - this week has felt 3 or 4 days too long!
Yeah right, we all know you hit the series-link-record button on your Sky Plus box.
Sue: Cheer up, dear; it could be worse. You could be living below the breadline in Somalia.
Amie: At some point, Samuel would've asked you to advance him some money. Guaranteed.
During a game of "doctors" yesterday, Abigail declared that I was too ill to work and wrote me a sick note. I think Ian might have asked for a second opinion, though...
Video.
Weird Tunes.
Joke: Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other, "You stay here, I’ll go on a head."
Yesterday we had lunch with my folks and then took a drive to Sutton Park.
Today's joke was quite good, which shocked me:
A policeman comes upon an accident, where a lawyer is moaning about the damage to his BMW. "Officer, I was leaving my car and a passing car sped by and ripped the door off its hinges! Look at the damage to my beautiful car!"
The officer replies, "The way you lawyers care so much about material stuff really makes me sick!"
"What the hell do you mean?!" replies the lower.
"Because," explains the officer, "you fail to notice that your arm was ripped off along with your door!".
"Oh no!" cries the lawyer. "Where's my Rolex?!"
I hope this weekend is relaxing. I could do with a nice chilled affair.
I've started driving to and from work instead of catching the dreaded 110 bus. It gives me a whole 2 hours of extra time, per day.
Put another way:
2 extra hours per working day =
10 extra hours per working week =
~450 extra hours per year (based on 45 working weeks per year) =
~18.75 extra days per year
For our trip to Lichfield I took my camera along with my 70-300mm telephoto lens, expecting to get some close-up shots of the fantastic stonework.
I didn't realise that you could take shots inside, (it wasn't even open the last two times I visited), and like a numpty I didn't take any other lenses with me. The telephoto wouldn't have been much use inside so I didn't bother paying the photo-pass fee. (Yes, they make you pay if you want to photograph inside).
I think I'm going to take another trip there some time soon with a couple of short lenses. I might even splash out and take a tour of the spires.
Weekend plans include a trip into Lichfield tomorrow for shopping and sightseeing. (The cathedral is amazing). I'm hoping to swing a lie-in at some point too; this week has been mental busy.
I'm watching the football tonight with a few chums, I think. The rest of the weekend, (apart from Sunday as it's Father's Day), is pretty open. Which is nice.
I'm currently watching our office go-fer, Gabbie, putting up England flag bunting in preparation for the World Cup. We've even got a 5 meter high inflatable, who is apparently called Barry.
We have recently turned my spare room into a proper room for Abigail, in anticipation of Jo and Abs moving in. (Once Jo's passed her driving test, that is).
She has a brand new bed and lots of pink everywhere - it's very girly! I'm fitting a new roller blind to the room tonight as the current bamboo effort has seen better days. I even bought new power tools and everything.
The 4th generation iPhone looks great. I hope that O2 will be good enough to let me upgrade without having to finish my current contract.
- Friday: Lunch at the Maharaja with a few of the Cherries.
- Saturday: Dinner at the Fazeley Park Contemporary Indian restaurant with Jo, Abigail and my brother Matt.
- Sunday: Biryani for dinner as cooked by Sat's wife.
Abigail's tastes are strange for a 5 year old. She loved her curry on Saturday, (including the tandoori mixed starter she shared with Jo), yet she turned her nose up at chocolate trifle on Sunday!
Hrm, writing about food has made me hungry.
Max: Waiter, I’m in a hurry, so what do you suggest?
Waiter: How about a sandwich, sir?
Max: Good idea! Bring me a crocodile sandwich, and make it snappy!
Jesus. I heard an excellent joke this morning, but I can't repeat it on here... it's a bit rude.
I had a very busy yet very productive bank holiday weekend. Got a mountain of work done on the flat, which is awesome. Shame about the weather, though...
It's spelt "telly", not "tele". Start spelling it right, or the puppy gets it.
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Sunday was good though, thanks to JoJo's awesome BBQ skills. We had burgers, marinated chicken and pork and mixed veg kebabs. The pork and chicken were both deliciously tender and juicy - no mean feat when cooking on a BBQ! Kudos to Jo!
The resulting steak was a bit odd. It had shrunk down in size and increased in density but was really really tender. Flavour was a bit lacking so I might get a fattier cut of beef, (I used sirloin), and try again some time.
I bit the bullet last night and properly installed Ubuntu 10.04 LTS on my old laptop. I'm impressed... really impressed.
Firstly, my USB wireless dongle worked straight out of the box! After spending ages with older incarnations of Linux trying in vain to get Wi-Fi working through a USB device, this is a massive plus.
Secondly, it is FAST. It boots up noticeably quicker than Windows and the time between logging in and being able to use the PC is teeny tiny. You have to take into account that my laptop is now quite old and while it isn't all that awful, it's not exactly bleeding-edge hardware. Even still, Ubuntu runs with hardly any lag.
Bye bye XP, you've been replaced. Replaced by something which didn't cost me a penny.
I took the opportunity to try the latest version of Ubuntu last night. It seemed really fast, even on my old, slow laptop.
Now I just have to get my USB Wi-Fi dongle working in linux... That should be a "fun" evening.
That was great, as she can now take it back in time for a free re-test. The real result was that the self-proclaimed Rover lover who did the MOT fixed the door which was left bent after the break-in attempt on Thursday!
We explained that we were going from the garage to a breaker's yard to source a new door and he said "oh, I've bent that back for you. It's not too bad; to be honest I'd live with it". We went outside to have a look, expecting the door to still be bent out a bit but he'd completely fixed it!
He also fixed the rear bumper, (again, free of charge), and he even set the clock in the cabin to the correct time! That one sent both Jo and myself into gales of shocked laughter.
It's really great to see that you can still get such a high level of customer service, especially with all the horror stories you hear about garages ripping folks off. I know that Jo will be using them again in the future and I may well do the same.
Yesterday was Jo's birthday so I attempted to spoil her silly. I did a print of a great portrait of Abigail which I took a month or two back and coupled it with a nice walnut frame. She was really pleased with it, which made my day - it's nice to give personal presents like that I think.
A meal out with her family in the evening made for a nice end to a fully redeemed birthday weekend. It was much needed after the horrible stress that was last week.
What sucks the most is that the car's up for it's MOT tomorrow. Luckily the guy at the garage says it shouldn't effect the outcome.
Max: Doc, can you open your window so I can drop gum balls onto the street?
Therapist: Why do you want to do that?
Max: Because I want to keep our streets free of elephants and that's the only way to do it.
Therapist: But there are no elephants in our streets.
Max: Thanks to me!
In other news, I'm almost back to regular health with one change - my stomach seems to be half the size it was this time last week. Every time I have dinner it feels like I've eaten waaay too much. I'm planning on making use of this situation to lose a few pounds.
Hopefully, Lady Luck will allow me to have a better week.
Yesterday was Abigail's 5th birthday party which was held at a local "play centre". It was great - there were slides, ball pits and some awesome electric go-karts which the kids loved. Everyone was really well behaved; it was a lot less hectic than I imagined! Everyone came back to Jo's for food and cake and that was the day was done.
Once the dust had settled, I realised that I'd negated to eat anything during all the running around. The roast pork dinner which Jo's mum cooked for us in the afternoon was most gratefully received!
Sunday evening was a write-off. Fell asleep after a couple of cans of beer, while watching Taxi Driver. Excellent.
The online video service was one which I could try immediately. The catalogue of films on offer isn't as good as the rental list, (although I did expect this to be the case), and the video quality isn't all that great. It's definitely watchable, though.
My first DVD order came through in the post yesterday and the first disc opened was scratched so bad that quarter of an hour of video was un-watchable. All in all I'm not impressed.
- Picnic down by the nature reserve
- Films and bombay mix
- Sleeping late
- Sea Life Centre
- Early night
- ????
- PROFIT!
I just had a steak baguette at The Red Lion. It was awesome.
Bring on the weekend!
If you have an iPhone, I highly recommend Zombie Smash - It's choice!
In other news I have the mother of all mouth ulcers, right at the back by my wisdom teeth. It's kicking my ass.
On Saturday I nipped into Brum to get my iPhone fixed at the Apple Store. The seal between screen and case had somehow broken and there was a fair bit of dust under the screen. The "Genius" who dealt with me replaced the whole screen there and then in about 10 minutes!
After a really busy week, the boss has just treated Alex and myself to a bite to eat at the local Italian. Mmm, cheers Ian!
From the top of the castle, Abigail spotted the fair which was on in the castle grounds so we had to go down and have a go on a few rides! I went on the tea cups with Abs - it made me green but she just giggled the whole way round... that's kids for you.
Yesterday was completely lazy and slobby in every way. Lunch consisted of American-style pancakes, slathered in maple syrup which Jo cooked, (they were awesome), followed by a 2 hour afternoon nap before taking the gals home.
I love the Easter bank holiday - who doesn't enjoy a 4 day weekend?! Unfortunately, I've caught a cold so we'll have to see how good mine is.
Have a great Easter!
I accompanied Jo to the hospital yesterday to have the cast removed from her, (now healed), broken wrist.
The turn-around time was surprisingly fast! When we arrived at the trauma centre, she was sent immediately to the plaster department where they whipped her old cast off in a matter of minutes. Next we were sent to the x-ray dept. where we only had to wait 4 or 5 minutes before being seen.
After that, all we needed was to get a splint cast fitted and we were done! All in all I think we were in there for about 35 minutes. Not bad, considering the letter which came with the appointment advised to keep 3 hours + free.
Just went down the Red Lion with a few of my fellow Cherries for a bit of Friday food. I had the fish and chips for the first time - it was a tad disappointing... The fish's batter was too thick and over-crispy for my liking and the chips were too firm in the middle despite being hotter than the sun.
All of the other meals I've eaten there were exceptional, (for a pub), so it's a bit of a downer!
Yesterday I took Jo, Abigail and my brother Matt to Kingsbury Water Park for a picnic, game of frisbee and a nice long walk around the lakes. Luckily the weather was spot-on, warm but not too hot - lovely!
I'm currently suffering with a throat infection of some sort and Jo's still in pain with her broken wrist so I think we'll be taking it easy this weekend. Tomorrow I have to take the car in for it's MOT - should do OK, touch wood.
On Sunday we're planning on going to Kingsbury Water Park for a few hours if the weather is fine and we both feel up to it, which I'm looking forward to. It'll be nice to get some fresh air after being in the office all week!
In other news, I have a horribly sore throat. Hope it doesn't develop into anything nasty - could really do with not being ill.
The photography outing on Saturday morning was fun, although I unfortunately didn't get any really decent results. Oh well, back to the drawing board.
The rest of Saturday was alright, although Jo developed a migraine on the evening which lasted throughout Sunday. We still managed to go visiting some of her family in the afternoon, though... she's a real trooper!
I can't remember if I mentioned previously but I'm entering this year's Practical Photography Photographer of the Year competition. The first round's category is "Landscapes" so I'm planning on getting up early and going over to Sutton Park to see if inspiration strikes.
I have some ND and gradient filters, (the grads were a 30th birthday present from my fellow cherries), so I'm going equipped to capture a landscape with some drama. I'll probably get a few HDR captures, while I'm at it.
Well, I thought it was funny.
- Caught up on my sleep
- Watched films; played games
- Ate a full rack of ribs at TGI Friday's
- Ate pizza at Pizza Hut
- Took JoJo to Sutton to sit her theory driving test. She passed!
- Drove around a race track in an Ariel Atom
- Had a look around Warwick Castle
A pretty good week off, I reckon.
The Ariel Atom drive yesterday was incredible. The racing instructor was really friendly; it was so strange being told to drive faster by someone for once!
After a couple of laps around, I was told to boot it, (literally), down one long straight. I thought that my foot was already pretty much on the floor but, OH MY GOD, when you put your foot right down you really know about it - it felt like my neck was breaking the acceleration was so fierce!
I'll admit that I was nervous as hell just before I got to the track but I loved every second of the drive. Hrm... wonder how long it would take me to save up for one...
An elderly man and his friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course. The man is about to hit a drive off the tee when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes and bows his head in prayer. His friend says, 'Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching gesture I have ever seen. You truly are a kind man'. 'Well', the man replies, 'we were married for 35 years.'
This weekend will mostly involve resting.
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